I went out to eat at Buffalo Wild Wings last week. Now, I know that their food is probably far from paleo, but I managed to do the best I could with what they had. I did so by doing a little research. I navigated to their website, browsed to the Menu section and downloaded a copy of their allergen information in PDF format. I then printed it out, went through it line by line and highlighted the safest things to eat. By safest, I mean free of all allergens. By allergens, I mean Dairy, Eggs, Shellfish, Soy, Gluten and Tree Nuts.
Now, some of those allergens do not bother me that much:
- Dairy Does not seem to bother me, and if it did, I would certainly know from the massive amounts of butter that I consume.
- Eggs I love eggs. They are good and good for you.
- Shellfish I love me some crawfish and oysters so I am not worried about this.
Then, there are the allergens that I do care about:
- Soy Fuck no, no bitch titties for me due to phytoestrogens.
- Gluten Fuck no. Wheat is murder. I don’t want my blood cells glycated nor my gut lining torn apart.
- Tree-Nuts Fuck no. Way too much polyunsaturated fats that will cause inflammation and fuck you up.
That said, I more or less made it my mission to avoid the latter three allergens at the very least. However, I ended up succumbing to the obsessive-compulsive part of my personality and went with whatever had no allergens at all.
So, here is what I found out. These are like the Big Wins. Following the 80/20 principle of getting the most out of as little as possible and going for the simplest yet most effective solution possible, these key takeaways will get you the most benefit.
- All of the beef that Buffalo Wild Wings serves contains soy. If you wanna be a good paleo person, do not order a burger.
- All of the fried items on the menu are fried using beef shortening. This is good news if you are paleo but like your fried shit. You see, most fried shit is fried in peanut oil or some other seed or nut oil, and that is never good news because seed oils and nut oils lack almost any nutrients and are full of crap that will trigger the inflammatory reflex. Beef shortening is better because it has a higher smoke point, which means it is not until much higher temperatures that the fat cells and cholesterol gets oxidized, damaged and becomes bad for you.
- If you want wings, order the Traditional wings. The boneless wings are breaded and then fried, which means they have wheat and gluten in them. The traditional wings are fried without breading.
- In the mood for a side item or some French Fried P’taters? Get the French Fries and/or the Buffalo chips as they are free of all allergens. The potato wedges have dairy and gluten in them.
- The Sweet BBQ, Honey BBQ, Hot, Mango Habanero, Wild and Blazin’ sauces are clear across the allergen board. All the rest are full of nasties.
- Most of the dry seasonings are safe. The only one that is a red flag is the Buffalo seasoning, which has dairy in it. So, if you have difficulty tolerating lactose, stick with your Salt ’n Vinegar, Desert Hot, Lemon Pepper, Chipotle BBQ and Cajun.
- Most of the salads contain gluten. The only salad that does not contain gluten is the Honey BBQ Chicken Salad, but it contains Dairy, Egg and Soy, so…no bueno.
Now, if you follow these guidelines and order everything allergen-free, you are not necessarily eating healthy. Buffalo Wild Wings’ meat is probably neither grass-fed nor pasture-raised, so the wings that you eat are likely from a malnourished chicken that had to share a room with two million other chickens. Regardless of what they use to fry their shit, it is never all that healthy to eat fried shit because it is easier to overcook shit when you fry it, and overcooking shit introduces carcinogens, oxidized cholesterol and damaged fat. No matter what sauce you choose, it probably contains spices that spent a lot of time sitting around in their containers in a warehouse before they got used, which means that there was plenty of time for mold to grow on them before they made their way into the sauce.
The point is this: if you want to eat obsessive-compulsive healthy, don’t go to Buffalo Wild Wings. But if you want to go to Buffalo Wild Wings and you want to do your best, use this guide.
Let me hear from you
Do you like Buffalo Wild Wings? What has been your experience with their food and allergens? How did using this guide work for you? Leave a reply below and let me know.